Punch Me Up to the Gods: A Memoir
- Downloads：4630
- Type：Epub+TxT+PDF+Mobi
- Create Date：2021-06-05 12:31:29
- Update Date：2025-09-06
- Status：finish
- Author：Brian Broome
- ISBN：0358449782
- Environment：PC/Android/iPhone/iPad/Kindle
- Download
Summary
A poetic and raw coming-of-age memoir in essays about blackness， masculinity， and addiction
Punch Me Up to the Gods introduces a powerful new talent in Brian Broome， whose early years growing up in Ohio as a dark-skinned Black boy harboring crushes on other boys propel forward this gorgeous， aching， and unforgettable debut。 Brian’s recounting of his experiences—in all their cringe-worthy， hilarious， and heartbreaking glory—reveal a perpetual outsider awkwardly squirming to find his way in。 Indiscriminate sex and escalating drug use help to soothe his hurt， young psyche， usually to uproarious and devastating effect。 A no-nonsense mother and broken father play crucial roles in our misfit’s origin story。 But it is Brian’s voice in the retelling that shows the true depth of vulnerability for young Black boys that is often quietly near to bursting at the seams。
Cleverly framed around Gwendolyn Brooks’s poem “We Real Cool，” the iconic and loving ode to Black boyhood， Punch Me Up to the Gods is at once playful， poignant， and wholly original。 Broome’s writing brims with swagger and sensitivity， bringing an exquisite and fresh voice to ongoing cultural conversations about blackness in America。
Punch Me Up to the Gods introduces a powerful new talent in Brian Broome， whose early years growing up in Ohio as a dark-skinned Black boy harboring crushes on other boys propel forward this gorgeous， aching， and unforgettable debut。 Brian’s recounting of his experiences—in all their cringe-worthy， hilarious， and heartbreaking glory—reveal a perpetual outsider awkwardly squirming to find his way in。 Indiscriminate sex and escalating drug use help to soothe his hurt， young psyche， usually to uproarious and devastating effect。 A no-nonsense mother and broken father play crucial roles in our misfit’s origin story。 But it is Brian’s voice in the retelling that shows the true depth of vulnerability for young Black boys that is often quietly near to bursting at the seams。
Cleverly framed around Gwendolyn Brooks’s poem “We Real Cool，” the iconic and loving ode to Black boyhood， Punch Me Up to the Gods is at once playful， poignant， and wholly original。 Broome’s writing brims with swagger and sensitivity， bringing an exquisite and fresh voice to ongoing cultural conversations about blackness in America。
Reviews
Thomas
，
It's brutal when you are an outsider。 It's brutal when you are an outsider。 。。。more
Danielle
，
It is but the first week of June and I already know this will be in my month's favorites 。 Broome's memoir flits back and forth between a bus ride and his memories。 On the bus， he sees a Black boy that reminds him of himself， shy but naturally curious， bleeding out for attention from his dad， who sits next to him trying to ignore him or adjust him or swat him， all almost imperceptible actions that seem to tell a part of the larger story of how Black boys are continuously molded and raised -- rai It is but the first week of June and I already know this will be in my month's favorites 。 Broome's memoir flits back and forth between a bus ride and his memories。 On the bus， he sees a Black boy that reminds him of himself， shy but naturally curious， bleeding out for attention from his dad， who sits next to him trying to ignore him or adjust him or swat him， all almost imperceptible actions that seem to tell a part of the larger story of how Black boys are continuously molded and raised -- raised to be not just men， but Black men， the epitome of cool and strong and masculine。 "Growing up， it didn't take me long to learn that my gayness detracted from my Blackness。 Black， gay men are punch lines to the Black community。 An anomaly to be ridiculed。 Relegated to the role of church choir directors。 We are a nationwide family secret， courtesy of masculinity and religion。"There is really no way I am going to be able to describe the potency of emotions that this stirs up。 Reading about what it means to be a Black gay boy in a small town of Ohio， a big city like Pittsburgh， or anywhere in the US at large， Broome will leave you feeling pitted and hallowed out， craving something to fill up the space。 The cyclical nature of seeing how Black boys， Black queer boys， are made and unmade， and made to hate themselves will make you want to mother him。 In fact， it was always the Black women in his life that saved him time and time again。 。。。more
Paige Mckenzie
，
I enjoyed this audiobook。 I recommended purchasing the book or audiobook。 I also recommend supporting a local Pittsburgh author。 This book really made me want to take Mr。 Broome’s class at Pitt。 This book was very introspective and touched are hard things。 I could feel and deeply understand the author’s feelings and thoughts on race/colorism， the black family and being black & different/queer。 The way the author writes about the past and his parent’s past is very matter of fact。 As a reader I fe I enjoyed this audiobook。 I recommended purchasing the book or audiobook。 I also recommend supporting a local Pittsburgh author。 This book really made me want to take Mr。 Broome’s class at Pitt。 This book was very introspective and touched are hard things。 I could feel and deeply understand the author’s feelings and thoughts on race/colorism， the black family and being black & different/queer。 The way the author writes about the past and his parent’s past is very matter of fact。 As a reader I feel the author has is empathy for his parents。When the author gives voice to his mother’s story on the audiobook， I hear the stories of my grandmothers and aunts（who have passed away）; and I can hear the tough road black women had in the 1940’s， 1950’s and 1960’s。 I can hear how hard it was to have aspirations and how one could feel stuck and trapped within their marriages and motherhood。 This book also provides a difficult look into black manhood and their struggle in steel towns and in America in general。 This book shows how this struggle did affect a black family during the end of the steel era。 I love how the writer describes neighborhoods I have known all my life like Squirrel Hill， Oakland， and The Hill District。 I can visualize the author on the P1 bus。 Hearing names of old department stores like Hills and old clubs like Pegasus remind me of my own past。 The author tells the truth about how he thought Pittsburgh would be his escape。 Instead he sadly faced the same racism of his small hometown in Ohio。 Here are some of the sentences that stuck out me in this book: What do you do when your own people don’t want you。 How do become anything。 Sometimes blessings come in the form of heartache at first。 People will tell you that times are different but only some love is granted public access。 It’s not that I want to display openly， but I’d like the option。 People from different races look a million different ways， maybe for all of us it’s been about who we deem as valuable as human beings and have access。 To me I have learned that black men aren’t valuable and aren’t worthy of love including myself。 。。。more
Kelly Parker
，
The author writes of his experience growing up as a gay， Black male， and the isolation and abuse that he took as a way of life。 His descriptions of his childhood home， where his father literally attempted to beat the gay out of him， are jarring and awful， and his account of living life as a lonely， self-loathing gay man isn’t any better。 It isn’t a pleasant read but the book is very good and does a fantastic job of helping the reader to walk in someone’s else’s worn out shoes。 Thanks to #netgall The author writes of his experience growing up as a gay， Black male， and the isolation and abuse that he took as a way of life。 His descriptions of his childhood home， where his father literally attempted to beat the gay out of him， are jarring and awful， and his account of living life as a lonely， self-loathing gay man isn’t any better。 It isn’t a pleasant read but the book is very good and does a fantastic job of helping the reader to walk in someone’s else’s worn out shoes。 Thanks to #netgalley and #houghtonmifflin for this ARC of #punchmeuptothegods in exchange for an honest review。 。。。more
Sheryl
，
Gorgeous writing about painful topics。 I was really loving this book all along， appreciating especially Brian's stories about Pittsburgh， and the theme of escaping small town Ohio really resonated with me （though of course I only perceived racism from my protected white girl bubble）The ending though。。。just wow。 I don't want to spoil the impact of it but when he revealed the destination of this bus journey that is the narrative framework of the book I got chills。 I am simultaneously heartbroken a Gorgeous writing about painful topics。 I was really loving this book all along， appreciating especially Brian's stories about Pittsburgh， and the theme of escaping small town Ohio really resonated with me （though of course I only perceived racism from my protected white girl bubble）The ending though。。。just wow。 I don't want to spoil the impact of it but when he revealed the destination of this bus journey that is the narrative framework of the book I got chills。 I am simultaneously heartbroken and joyous。 Definitely one to listen to read by the author。 。。。more
Les
，
（4。5 stars）: In my emerging tradition， I listened to this book because it was read （performed really） by the author。 Many thoughts still rolling through my synapses and it's just a brutal experience to listen to or read， though I'm honored to bear witness。 Definitely an education。 It's always interesting to me how children that are mistreated， abused， or completely neglected by their parents choose to forgive or say they forgive them because death is imminent， when they were such ogres （the pare （4。5 stars）: In my emerging tradition， I listened to this book because it was read （performed really） by the author。 Many thoughts still rolling through my synapses and it's just a brutal experience to listen to or read， though I'm honored to bear witness。 Definitely an education。 It's always interesting to me how children that are mistreated， abused， or completely neglected by their parents choose to forgive or say they forgive them because death is imminent， when they were such ogres （the parents） in life。 Acceptance yes， but forgiveness that's not even requested or welcomed？ I guess; people have to make decisions they can live with。 And wow did this man。。。on SO many levels， even when he couldn't live with them or through them。 Yet， here he is。 I'll also add that's it's been years since a final chapter （Tabula Rasa） came roaring through so masterfully with such precision， grace， truth， grit and raw authenticity that I had to listen to it twice （I would have just highlighted it all had I been reading）。 It was explosive and grounding at the same time。 I was wondering would there be any payoff for all the relentless terror that I was reading/listening to up to that point。 Short answer: Much。 。。。more
Margaret
，
This is a hard read， a memoir about being Black and gay and being raised by a father who thinks Black masculinity is the epitome of greatness， and there's no way he'll let his son act in any way different than Black masculine heteronormativity。 Broome tells his story while watching a Black father interact with his son Tuan on a bus ride， making connections in his memories as the father takes up a similar Black masculine authority figure as Broome's father。 There's so much homophobia， racism， chi This is a hard read， a memoir about being Black and gay and being raised by a father who thinks Black masculinity is the epitome of greatness， and there's no way he'll let his son act in any way different than Black masculine heteronormativity。 Broome tells his story while watching a Black father interact with his son Tuan on a bus ride， making connections in his memories as the father takes up a similar Black masculine authority figure as Broome's father。 There's so much homophobia， racism， child molestation， child endangerment， and， later in Broome's life， drug use and indiscriminate sex in often frightening scenarios。 This is a deeply uncomfortable book， and it should be。 As a parent， it made me all the more aware of why openly discussing and accepting genders and sexualities from a young age on is so important。 Children need to know their parents are always there for them no matter who they are or will become。 。。。more
Ryan
，
PUNCH ME UP TO THE GODS is a new memoir by Brian Broome， where he explores the intersection of race and sexuality growing up in western Ohio。 Brian is black and gay which defined his relationships early in his life。 The book is framed around the poem， We Real Cool by Gwendolyn Brooks， with each line introducing a different section。 Every other chapter is “The Intiatian of Twan” where the author describes an experience on a bus watching the interactions of a young boy and his father。 These explor PUNCH ME UP TO THE GODS is a new memoir by Brian Broome， where he explores the intersection of race and sexuality growing up in western Ohio。 Brian is black and gay which defined his relationships early in his life。 The book is framed around the poem， We Real Cool by Gwendolyn Brooks， with each line introducing a different section。 Every other chapter is “The Intiatian of Twan” where the author describes an experience on a bus watching the interactions of a young boy and his father。 These explorations of black masculinity frame personal statements about domestic violence， sex， identity， depression， and addiction。 Unlike many memoirs I read， this one gets better as it goes along and the ending is so strong I finished the second half in one sitting。 The writing is excellent。 Broome digs deep into the details his memories to pull out universal themes and ideas with exquisite descriptions and beautiful sentences。 The audiobook is read by the author and while the performance was good， the sound and editing was off。 I could tell that there were breaks in recording because the sound quality or tone changed。 I loved this book and highly recommend everyone read it。 。。。more
ohm
，
Incredibly well written memoir that pulls you in and won’t let go。 Thank you to this Brave author for sharing。
Uchenna （favourite_igbo_boy）
，
A solid 4。5 star read。Review to come。
Jennifer M。
，
Overall， I felt kinda meh about this book。 Not necessarily bad， but not particularly memorable either。 Giving it 2。5/5 Stars。
Leanne
，
Excellent。 Heart breaking at times， full of raw emotion and honesty。
jennet wheatstonelllsl
，
Lzlzlz
Jamie
，
Searing and heartbreaking， this was one of the most thoughtfully created memoirs I’ve ever read。 With the narrative of a bus trip in which he watches a little Black boy be molded into a version of manhood that causes Broom to go back and forth through his life to mine his pain， addiction， decisions， and insights into gayness， Blackness， identity。 Highly recommended。
Leigh Anne
，
Straight talk， no chaser。If this book doesn't win a Lammy next year， I'll eat my Hills-scented candle without a slushee to wash it down。 Northeast Ohio and Western Pennsylvania are the backdrop for this memoir of Black queer manhood and the many elements that keep it from full flower。And by "elements" I mean ever-present racism， internalized homophobia， addiction and， sadly， abuse from folks who don't know how to love Broome， but are doing their best to protect him from a world they know will be Straight talk， no chaser。If this book doesn't win a Lammy next year， I'll eat my Hills-scented candle without a slushee to wash it down。 Northeast Ohio and Western Pennsylvania are the backdrop for this memoir of Black queer manhood and the many elements that keep it from full flower。And by "elements" I mean ever-present racism， internalized homophobia， addiction and， sadly， abuse from folks who don't know how to love Broome， but are doing their best to protect him from a world they know will be unkind。 Generational trauma looms large here， and the essay written in Broome's mother's voice makes it clear that the author both understands and loves the woman who raised him （there's no better way to say "I love you" than to make a person feel SEEN）。There is wit and humor here， too， in flashes; local readers who have been following Broome on social media forever will recognize the witty retorts and rhetorical volleys that have kept them entertained over the years。 Readers who know the region will also resonate with Broome's description of places and spaces they know: Warren， Ohio， after Black Monday。 The aforementioned Hills Department store。 Sparkle Market。 The Red Caboose。 But even if you don't know those spaces， you will grasp their ethos thanks to Broome's place-making。 He writes these spots in such a way that you'll believe you are right there with him。The same geographical care is taken with Pittsburgh: the long bus ride， which serves as a framing narrative for the memoir， begins in McKeesport， ends downtown， and covers all the territory in-between。 A little boy named Tuan， who is also riding the bus， is the prompt for Broome's recollections of his childhood， his fervent hope that the little boy's upbringing will be kinder than his own， and his fears that it won't be。It's a good thing the reader knows Broome lived to tell the tale， because the odds are ridiculously stacked against him。 He has no qualms about revealing all the abuses heaped on him: by other children， teachers， his struggling parents， and his own brother。 He also doesn't flinch from telling you in great detail all the things he has done that he is now ashamed of， all the self-loathing that he is just now learning to forgive himself for。 He throws the reader back to the time when Pride was definitely not sponsored by corporations， explores how colorism complicates queerness， and reveals the unusual things he'd do for love and drug money （it's not what you think， but it's definitely unusual， except in Pittsburgh perhaps）。 The reason traumatized folks struggle so much is because the past is a place， real estate in your head and heart that is impossible to sell or give away。 Broome exorcises his past not by trying to shove it away， but by resurrecting its ghosts and letting them burn themselves out in the retelling。 It's visceral。 You feel like you're walking through fire next to him， unable to help the child， anxious to see how on earth he's going to become the man you know he grows up to be。 Telling the truth， they say， shames the devil， and Broome's truth shames the devil so much here that Satan changes his name and skips town without leaving a forwarding address。 Telling you where that bus ride ultimately leads the author would spoil the joy of reading it yourself。 Suffice to say that， after a lifetime of baptism by fire， Broome is finally christened with water and the spirit， in a pagan sort of way that you'll celebrate when you get there。I mean。 Words just don't。 The only thing missing here is the 'hood Giant Eagle， and that's actually fine because after a debut like this， I'm pretty sure we're getting another book。 Thank you， Brian Broome， for sharing your gifts with us。 I hope you make so much money you never HAVE to write again and can just focus on doing what you obviously love and are incredibly good at。 Recommended for all library collections， especially in the OH/PA/WV triangle， but definitely everywhere: there are queer Black boys in America who will need this book， and you should have it ready for them when they come looking for something they cannot yet articulate。 。。。more
Anne Meyer
，
I listened to the author read the audiobook， and that was a worthwhile experience。 Memoirs are great to listen to in the author's voice because it adds a dimension to the story that doesn't come through in a book reading。 I also enjoyed and appreciated the way the author used his observations of a young man on a bus in present time to spring into his own stories from the past。 I listened to the author read the audiobook， and that was a worthwhile experience。 Memoirs are great to listen to in the author's voice because it adds a dimension to the story that doesn't come through in a book reading。 I also enjoyed and appreciated the way the author used his observations of a young man on a bus in present time to spring into his own stories from the past。 。。。more
Diane Payne
，
Brian Broome's memoir is set up in a way where we see him on the bus observing a young toddler with his distracted father speaking apparently to the boy's mother on the phone， while Broome reflects on how this father is teaching his Black son to be a Black son， remembering what it was like for Broome to have his father remind him that he'd rather him himself than have a white person kill his son。 The memoir starts out with the author young at school， and then moves onward， until he leaves Ohio， Brian Broome's memoir is set up in a way where we see him on the bus observing a young toddler with his distracted father speaking apparently to the boy's mother on the phone， while Broome reflects on how this father is teaching his Black son to be a Black son， remembering what it was like for Broome to have his father remind him that he'd rather him himself than have a white person kill his son。 The memoir starts out with the author young at school， and then moves onward， until he leaves Ohio， and becomes a part of the gay drug scene in Pittsburgh。 Eventually， the memoir takes a pause so we can hear from his mother， someone he wished he had listened to earlier， providing readers with a glimpse into her world， and her life with his father。Much of this memoir evolves around being Black and the ways Broome tried fitting in with White classmates， rarely fitting in with the Black students who viewed him as being a pussy， never tough enough， tough enough to survive being Black in a White world。 Then the memoir shifts more into being an adult， doing drugs， and being a part of the 90s gay world。It's an engaging memoir where the author doesn't slip into the pity mode， but shows readers what his life has been like， and why and where he directs his anger and his love。 。。。more
Jenny Nicholson
，
this book is a gift。 a heartbreaking， sometimes hard to read gift， but a gift nonetheless。 this and memorial drive are the only two memoirs of the many many many I have read that have taken up a space in my heart and will stay there for a long long time。 if all of us were as willing to let people see us as Brian Broome is in this book， we’d all be so much less sick and sad。
Sara
，
"we learn that white boys are people and Asian boys are exotic and Hispanic boys are luxurious and Black boys are for sex。"Punch Me Up to the Gods is a raw， powerful memoir that explores the ideals of Black masculinity， and that intersection with the queer identity， and what it is to be a queer Black man in the USA。 It is brutal， powerful and superbly honest。The memoir comes as a collection of essays about moments throughout Brian Broome's life， glavanized （and organized for us） through a shared "we learn that white boys are people and Asian boys are exotic and Hispanic boys are luxurious and Black boys are for sex。"Punch Me Up to the Gods is a raw， powerful memoir that explores the ideals of Black masculinity， and that intersection with the queer identity， and what it is to be a queer Black man in the USA。 It is brutal， powerful and superbly honest。The memoir comes as a collection of essays about moments throughout Brian Broome's life， glavanized （and organized for us） through a shared bus trip between narrator and a small Black boy named Tuan。 I found this really interesting， and this starting point made me reflect and approach the essays in such a different way。This book talks of racism， homophobia， physical/emotional/sexual abuse， toxic masculinity， misogyny， family， addiction/alcoholism。 With humour and a great writing style （felt almost poetic at points）， one feels saddened but still wants to keep reading。 I really appreciate the realness and unsanitized depictions。 This is seen in other themes too， but Brian talks about being queer while not being a "good queer" - ashamed， denial， hidding， wishing it away; cowardice sometimes feels forbidden to queer stories。 。。。more
Nancy
，
10 pages in and it is EXCELLENT！
Justin Hall
，
Powerful。 Heart breaking。 Raw and poignant。 This book is a memoir for so many who have had imperfect childhoods and suffered the pangs of racism and homophobia。 But its also a book for those who have not。 I have great respect for Broomes life story and his ability to tell it。 Empathy and understanding only happen when we open ourselves up to life experiences different from our own。 This books parallel story between his childhood and bus ride watching a young baby boy named Tuan was my favorite a Powerful。 Heart breaking。 Raw and poignant。 This book is a memoir for so many who have had imperfect childhoods and suffered the pangs of racism and homophobia。 But its also a book for those who have not。 I have great respect for Broomes life story and his ability to tell it。 Empathy and understanding only happen when we open ourselves up to life experiences different from our own。 This books parallel story between his childhood and bus ride watching a young baby boy named Tuan was my favorite aspect and made the book a page turner。Thanks so much for Taryn and HMH for getting this book into my hands。 Very glad i got to read it。 。。。more
Jina Biller
，
Don't waste your money or time。 The author faced with numerous valid setbacks chooses unacceptable， irresponsible， and dangerous behaviors rather than dealing with or EVER attempting to proceed respectably。 Furthermore， he is unapologetic and more than satisfied to make excuses and point the finger else wise rather than be accountable or even ever attempt to proceed with any shred of honor。 This book is pathetic and inexcusable。 Don't waste your money or time。 The author faced with numerous valid setbacks chooses unacceptable， irresponsible， and dangerous behaviors rather than dealing with or EVER attempting to proceed respectably。 Furthermore， he is unapologetic and more than satisfied to make excuses and point the finger else wise rather than be accountable or even ever attempt to proceed with any shred of honor。 This book is pathetic and inexcusable。 。。。more
Wrapped Up in Books
，
I went into this book not knowing anything about the author， but I love a good memoir， and I saw this one had something to do with addiction， which sounded interesting。 The whole time I was reading it， I kept thinking how lyrical it was and it seemed to be written by a poet。 Later on， I saw that many of the book reviews called it “poetic”- okay， great， so I was right in my feeling about the style of the writing。 We also learn in the introduction that James Baldwin was a big inspiration to the au I went into this book not knowing anything about the author， but I love a good memoir， and I saw this one had something to do with addiction， which sounded interesting。 The whole time I was reading it， I kept thinking how lyrical it was and it seemed to be written by a poet。 Later on， I saw that many of the book reviews called it “poetic”- okay， great， so I was right in my feeling about the style of the writing。 We also learn in the introduction that James Baldwin was a big inspiration to the author。 This is the story of Brian Broome， a black man from Ohio， who later moves to Pittsburgh。 Brian is also poor， and we later learn， gay。 Additionally， as mentioned， he does have addiction issues。 We explore his relationship with his parents， including one surprise chapter written in the voice of his mother， which I loved。 Brian is honest is portrait of himself。 He has no ego overriding his story of growing up from boyhood into the type of older man he used to laugh at。 Along the way， he goes to seedy bars and suspect apartments of men， but also fashionable clubs where he snorts drugs in the bathroom。 Interspersed with his own life story are his observations of a toddler he sees on the bus。 The little guy is a black child with his black father， and Brian watches how they interact。 He reflects on how some things never change in how black males are raised- such as being told to not cross your legs “like a girl”。 But we are in a new world then the one Brian lived in as a toddler， and there is hope that this young boy on the bus will grow up in a better， more accepting society that will embrace him。This book was raw， sometimes sad， sometimes funny and definitely worth a read。 4。5 stars 。。。more
Shana Zucker
，
3。5 stars。 More of a memoir in vignettes; I didn’t like when he switched into his mother’s voice。 Otherwise everything was very raw perspectives of being a gay Black man in America。
Sosha
，
If you read one memoir， hell， if you read one book this year， it should be “Punch Me Up the the Gods” by Brian Broome。This book - the spot-on language， the breathtaking structure and the clever dark humor is a force of nature。 Generally， when I like a book as much as I liked this one， I greedily devour it。 However， I spaced this one out， took my time with it because I knew I didn’t want it to end。
Barbara Koefod
，
Excellent， heart wrenching， hopeful memoir！ In Broome's gorgeous voice， he opens so many insights into the challenges of being gay， black and poor。 Stunning prose。 Excellent， heart wrenching， hopeful memoir！ In Broome's gorgeous voice， he opens so many insights into the challenges of being gay， black and poor。 Stunning prose。 。。。more
Brian Rothbart
，
Brian Broome’s in his powerful， insightful memoir， Punch Me Up to the Gods， writes about what it means to be a man， Black， Gay， and a combination of all three。 He also discusses what we all want， which is to fit in， feel that you belong， and are loved。 You will feel lots of different emotions when you read this book， you will laugh， and you may cry but you will also learn and/or feel a connection to Broome。 I highly recommend this book。
Kristine
，
All the stars。 This was horribly painful to read。 Devastating and gorgeous。 A must read for anyone who has also been studying antiracism。 I hope this is the first of many， many books Broome writes。
Paris （parisperusing）
，
Brian Broome's Punch Me Up to the Gods is no gay anthem， it is a ballad to which every brokenhearted Black queer boy knows the word。 It begins as all indelible sad songs do， with a confession to shame: "Any Black boy who did not signify how manly he was at all times deserved to be punched back up to God to be remade， reshaped。" Black boys love sad songs too， we sing them all the time: in the safe dimension of our dreams， where we assume God is not listening。“Homosexuality， as it so often does， a Brian Broome's Punch Me Up to the Gods is no gay anthem， it is a ballad to which every brokenhearted Black queer boy knows the word。 It begins as all indelible sad songs do， with a confession to shame: "Any Black boy who did not signify how manly he was at all times deserved to be punched back up to God to be remade， reshaped。" Black boys love sad songs too， we sing them all the time: in the safe dimension of our dreams， where we assume God is not listening。“Homosexuality， as it so often does， attacked me in my bed in the middle of the night，" Broome writes of his adolescent paramour Alex， whose "chocolate brown eyes and coal black hair" open a portal into a "television world" of whiteness and love。 Us Black boys， we know this yearning。 On rare nights， I am in the second grade again。 I am sitting behind pale-skinned Charlie， whose upper lip has already sprouted fuzz。 In this reverie， I am swimming my fingers through the black waves of his hair。 Like Broome， I have waded the sweet waters of dreams and unrequited love。 But dreams are just dreams。 By turns a gut-punch and a poem， Punch Me Up to the Gods is a tragic and disarming depiction of the inescapable headlock of self-hatred， colorism， and Black shame， and a painful but inspiring parable I hope will reach the hands of Black queer boys everywhere。 Like Brandon Taylor， Saeed Jones， and Danez Smith， Brian Broome will always have a friend in me。 。。。more
Brian
，